Get real…

The last few months, I have been bombarded with FB friend requests from men and “followers “on Instagram. These are all men seeking relationships or female attention. There is absolutely nothing wrong with that but there are some things that these types of men all have in common–neediness and loneliness.  They need clarification on some things to stop them from  continuing to get hurt and disappointed.

This post is addressed to this type specifically…..

Just because a girl accepts your friend request or whatever on social media, does not necessarily mean that she wants to date you. Sometimes she accepts to be nice for various reasons. Also, just because  a girl is single does not automatically mean that she wants every available single man contacting her. She may  be content on her own and doesn’t even want to date.

Not every woman is so desperate that they are willing to throw away their priorities to go chasing after the next “internet man” that shows them attention. Quality women have standards and know what they want–and will not allow their priorities to get messed up over a man- or waste their time on one that can’t give them what they want or need.


A lot of you want to spends hours or days emailing, messaging back on forth, going and and on and on with nothing but small talk.  Quality women have lives–productive lives with careers, not just jobs— and they have REAL life stuff going on and do not have time to play on the computer or phone all day. If I meet someone online that  I want to get to know,  I will ask to get communication to spill over in real life. I d rather have a 10 minute phone convo over spending endless hours texting or emailing etc. I find small talk and too much “e communication” very annoying , time wasting and pointless. 


So to all the guys that I just described–maybe you should try to stop spending so much time hiding in the “fake world” of the internet and start spending more time living “real” in real life. I totally understand loneliness and know it all too well-but hiding behind a smokescreen all the time is not “real” and will not make it go away. Find  a hobby, get active in church, do volunteer work, find yourself–get involved in REAL life with REAL people and do REAL things... 

That is how the loneliness will go away.  Think about this too. The only women that have time to spend hours and hours talking to someone, they know nothing about, are women that also need to be getting out and living in the real world–and more than likely don’t have jobs…or they even could scam artists are gold diggers they prey on lonely men.

THINK–THINK about this for a minute.

Living in the real world and doing real things will net “real” results with personal “in person” relationships—with real people-that you can see and touch and verify who they are.

It is heartbreaking to see all the loneliness out there. I wish that I could make more understand that the solution is living outside in the real world instead of always behind a screen.

 

A “good woman” is hard to find….

A “good woman is hard to find….

…when you don’t have your shit together.

I got a message from a “rocker dude” today excited to find me since most classify me as a “rocker chick”

He does seem like a pretty cool due except for the fact that in his profile he states that he is “separated but still living with her”……and is looking for a “good woman”

Seriously?

Seriously???

What kind of woman does he think that he will attract???

It’s not going to be a woman of value or as he calls it “a good one.” No woman that knows her worth will touch that with a 10 foot pole.

All he is going to get is desperate, “easy” drama filled ones and bitch and complain because that is all he can find.

I don’t care that he can take me too see all my fave bands and he can do “this,” do “that” and buy me anything I want.

Homie don’t play that.

Bye Felecia!

Men, if you want a woman that is stable and has morals, self respect and self worth, you must first become that same kind of man yourself.  You attract what you promote.

THINK men THINK….and with the brain on top of your head.

Peace & love,

~Tiff

 

For the guys…..

I have interacted with a lot of males that complained to me about their dating difficulties as much, if not more, then women do.

There are some things that I have observed in todays’ dating society that may or may not apply to some of these negative situations that I have heard from men. This is all my own personal opinion/observations and it’s perfectly ok if some people do not agree.

One thing that I have noticed is that there is an increasingly amount of men that would prefer women to pursue them. Personally, I have a lot of personal experience with this.

If they choose to be like that, then that is their choice. However, there is something that they may not realize.

Quality women that know their value and have self worth and self respect will not chase after a man and/or throw themselves at them. They want the man to be the man and pursue them the old fashioned way-or at least I do anyway.

Another thing that I observed is that some of the men I have communicated with have very low self esteems. They think “there is  no way that a girl like that would be interested in me”. This is self sabotage and if that is truly how they feel about themselves it sends out negative vibes and messages that push women away. They  probably don’t even realize that they are doing this.  In addition, a woman of value very well knows that she can’t “fix a man” and is not going to waste her time trying and will simply walk away.

Self absorption. That is another issue that I see. Men could have an incredible amazing women standing right in front of him showing signs that she is interested and they don’t even notice. Some women are ok with being straight forward and others not some much. Remember a women with self respect and quality is highly unlikely to completely throw herself at a man. She will give subtle compliments etc and if he so caught up in himself and/or his own world to even see it, she will give up and move on.

Gentlemen remember, once a woman is done she is done. Maybe some of you just need to pay attention a little more and consider some of the things that I just spoke of. Just food for thought. It may save you from missing out-if it’s not already too late.

Thanks for reading,

Peace & love,

~Tiff