A “good woman” is hard to find….

A “good woman is hard to find….

…when you don’t have your shit together.

I got a message from a “rocker dude” today excited to find me since most classify me as a “rocker chick”

He does seem like a pretty cool due except for the fact that in his profile he states that he is “separated but still living with her”……and is looking for a “good woman”

Seriously?

Seriously???

What kind of woman does he think that he will attract???

It’s not going to be a woman of value or as he calls it “a good one.” No woman that knows her worth will touch that with a 10 foot pole.

All he is going to get is desperate, “easy” drama filled ones and bitch and complain because that is all he can find.

I don’t care that he can take me too see all my fave bands and he can do “this,” do “that” and buy me anything I want.

Homie don’t play that.

Bye Felecia!

Men, if you want a woman that is stable and has morals, self respect and self worth, you must first become that same kind of man yourself.  You attract what you promote.

THINK men THINK….and with the brain on top of your head.

Peace & love,

~Tiff

 

For the guys…..

I have interacted with a lot of males that complained to me about their dating difficulties as much, if not more, then women do.

There are some things that I have observed in todays’ dating society that may or may not apply to some of these negative situations that I have heard from men. This is all my own personal opinion/observations and it’s perfectly ok if some people do not agree.

One thing that I have noticed is that there is an increasingly amount of men that would prefer women to pursue them. Personally, I have a lot of personal experience with this.

If they choose to be like that, then that is their choice. However, there is something that they may not realize.

Quality women that know their value and have self worth and self respect will not chase after a man and/or throw themselves at them. They want the man to be the man and pursue them the old fashioned way-or at least I do anyway.

Another thing that I observed is that some of the men I have communicated with have very low self esteems. They think “there is  no way that a girl like that would be interested in me”. This is self sabotage and if that is truly how they feel about themselves it sends out negative vibes and messages that push women away. They  probably don’t even realize that they are doing this.  In addition, a woman of value very well knows that she can’t “fix a man” and is not going to waste her time trying and will simply walk away.

Self absorption. That is another issue that I see. Men could have an incredible amazing women standing right in front of him showing signs that she is interested and they don’t even notice. Some women are ok with being straight forward and others not some much. Remember a women with self respect and quality is highly unlikely to completely throw herself at a man. She will give subtle compliments etc and if he so caught up in himself and/or his own world to even see it, she will give up and move on.

Gentlemen remember, once a woman is done she is done. Maybe some of you just need to pay attention a little more and consider some of the things that I just spoke of. Just food for thought. It may save you from missing out-if it’s not already too late.

Thanks for reading,

Peace & love,

~Tiff

 

 

Full circle……

I have not posted anything in a while and I apologize.  Things have become incredibly busy in my world in the past 1-2 months.

Back in Dec. ’16, I started a spiritual journey and asked God to reveal a lot of things to me and to show me what I needed to do to  finally get the answer to a prayer that I have been praying for many years now.

I still don’t have the answer to my prayer but I believe without a doubt that it will be coming soon.

A few weeks ago, I went to church and we had a guest Pastor. His message was very powerful and I felt like he was talking directly to me.

He preached about how we get inpatient and lose faith between the time of asking God for something and waiting for Him to answer.

Very often our time table and God’s timetable don’t always align. God will also not give us something that we are not ready for or something that we will screw up once we get it.

This was powerful to me because it just validated everything I felt when I started my journey–that there were things that I needed to accomplish and learn before I could have my prayer granted.

Since the start of my journey, I have grown by leaps and bounds and have made huge changes in my life. I have walked away from a lot of people, places and things that were dragging me down and holding me back, amongst many other things.

On Jan 1, 17, when other people were making superficial New Year resolutions, I decided to cross something off my bucket list-learn photography. It was something that I always wanted to do. So on New Years day, I ordered my first “real camera” and signed up for a 6 week class at a local college.

In Feb, I was elected as a Board Member to my state’s American Foundation for Suicide Prevention Chapter.

A couple of months, ago, I decided to learn more about photography so I became a student at the New York Institute of Photography and I’m currently studying through them.

At my daughter’s urging, I created a FB page exclusively for my photography to showcase my work to a larger audience, a couple of months ago. I have people that I don’t know emailing me and making complimentary comments on my shots and my “talent”

I have also  been selling numerous prints, have been asked to set up a booth at a community art event and someone has even spoke to me about me being an “artist of a month” in a local gallery. My CPA friend suggested that I get a Tax ID number, which I now have–I don’t know what the hell to do with it, but I have it.

To say that I have been blown away by all of this would be a huge understatement.

It has been all so crazy and unexpected but yet, at the same time, I am the most content that I ever remember being in my adult life.

None of the above that I described would have happened if I would ve had my pray answered when I wanted too because I would ve been so caught up in that I would have neglected myself.

See how God works?

A long time before I was a nurse, I was actually a “starving artist”. For years, I played the clarinet, wrote poetry, lyrics, shorts stories etc. I also wanted to learn the artistic side of photography back then as well. However, people always thought I was a bit strange and just didn’t “‘get me”. I suppressed a lot of myself because I just didn’t fit in very much.

So I became a nurse, when push came to shove when I found out that I was pregnant.  At that time I was a “professional college student”.

I was forced to “grow up” so to speak and had to get myself grounded so I could be financially stable to raise my child.

For years, I buried the artistic side of myself and forgot that it was even there.

Once my daughter started getting older and went away to her residential high school, the artistic side has gradually been coming back-obviously.

Now, I feel like I am finally the person that I should ve been all along. There is a lot of freedom and self peace that comes along with that.

Since studying photography, I have been traveling throughout my state and even went on a cruise to Cozumel recently.  In doing all of this, I have spent a lot of time alone doing a lot of soul searching. This would not have happened if I wouldn’t have picked up a camera..and I wouldn’t have a camera if I would not have asked God to show me what I needed to do.

Again, full circle.

I “get” everything now. Before I can get my answer, I have to first find out who I am and be content with myself.

At any time now, I know that my answer will be coming because I feel like I am where God wants me to be–happy, content with a full understanding of myself.

For all of you reading, if I have any message to carry it’s this. Don’t ever be afraid of who you are, even though people may not understand you. You may stand alone but at least you will be content and true to yourself. Also, don’t ever be afraid to start something new, no matter your age. I will be 46 in a couple of weeks and have just started a new career/business. It is NEVER too late to live your dream.

Thanks for reading…

Peace & love

~Tiff

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MIA: Old Fashioned Romance

Old Fashioned romance…….

 

What has happened to it?

In this day of “’instant gratification” it seems to have been lost

“Real” values and sweet simple gestures now seem to be considered to be out dated.

I would prefer to have a “real”  10-minute phone conversation over ‘all day long’ pointless BS texting or via other forms of electronic communication

I want flowers instead of JPEG or GIF images

I want sitting under the stars holding hands or cuddling on the couch instead of going to the newest trendiest restaurant.

I want a real soul connection

I want someone to ask me how my day was.

REAL

I want REAL

The feeling of butterflies when you see a special someone.

I want to see the twinkle in his eye when he sees s me.

I want to be the reason behind his smile

I want to inhale and get drunk off his cologne when he holds me.

I want to be treated like a lady..

having my door opened for me and feeling his hand on my lower back leading me….

help taking off and putting on my coat…

having my chair pulled out for me.

I want to be respected and valued.

I want to be addressed by my name…

Not sexy

Baby

Honey..

But beautiful is ok 🙂

I want someone that doesn’t expect sex so soon because I prefer it to be meaningful.

I want those small sweet gestures that are so now overlooked. Its those small things that mean the most to me.

I’m tired of the swiping left and right…

Having inappropriate pictures sent to me

One-night stand requests

And/or

Expectations of sex after soon meeting

And/or

Requests for threesomes etc

I am tired of being one of many options.

I want someone that wants to take the time to get to know me—and me alone.

I want monogamy.

All these things that hold true to me are very rare to find these days.

I feel like the “uptight girl” in a world where quick casual sex and serial dating is the norm.

I’d rather be that odd ball out instead of selling myself to try and fit in.

I want the “old fashioned” stuff over anything else.

Until then….

I will be the “uptight dork” hiding behind my Canon and MAC until it comes along…